When You’ve Let Go But Haven’t Moved On: The Power of the In-Between

There’s a strange stretch of time that happens after a big eye-opening change.

You’ve let go—of a role, a relationship, a dream, an identity. Maybe it was your choice. Maybe it wasn’t. But either way, it’s gone.

And now…

Now what?

You’re no longer who you were.
But you’re not yet sure who you’re becoming.
You’ve made space, but nothing new has arrived to fill it.

This is the liminal season. The in-between.
And it’s one of the hardest parts of healing.

🕳️ The Gap Between Goodbye and Beginning Again

Our culture loves a before-and-after story. We rush to fill the silence with solutions. We pressure ourselves to “move on” as if grief follows a tight schedule or identity can be updated like a profile picture.

But what if the space between letting go and moving on isn’t a problem to solve?

What if it’s sacred?

This stretch—the one where you feel suspended and unsure—isn’t a sign you’re doing life wrong.
It’s a sign you’re doing something very human and very brave.

You’re choosing to be present in the gap.

💬 Why This Space Feels So Uncomfortable

Let’s be honest: this space is awkward. It doesn’t come with clear instructions or guaranteed outcomes.

You might feel like:

• You should “have a plan by now.”

• You’re wasting time or falling behind.

• You’re supposed to feel better already.

• Everyone else seems to have it together.

Here’s what’s really happening:
Your inner world is catching up to what your outer world has already released.

It takes time to grieve who you were.
It takes energy to resist rushing toward something just to feel productive.
And it takes courage to be with what is, rather than forcing what’s next.

🌿 Holding Space Instead of Rushing Forward

So, how do you live in this space? How do you keep from forcing a false new beginning—or falling into despair?

Here are a few gentle practices to support your in-between:

1. Acknowledge the Transition

Say it out loud or write it down: “I’ve let go of ____.”
Give it the dignity it deserves. Grief doesn’t require a funeral to be real.

2. Resist the Urge to Fill the Void

Your nervous system may crave action or control. Instead, ask yourself:
“What am I trying to avoid feeling right now?”
Let that be your guide.

3. Practice “Yet” Thinking

You don’t know the next chapter… yet.
You don’t feel whole… yet.
You don’t see the way forward… yet.
But it’s coming. And your presence now helps you recognize it when it arrives.

4. Keep a “Noticing Journal”

Not a gratitude list or a five-year vision. Just a place to write what you’re noticing:
– What gives you a flicker of joy?
– What no longer feels like a fit?
– What small things feel grounding?
These breadcrumbs lead somewhere—slowly and honestly.

🧭 You’re Not Stuck. You’re in Transit.

Think of this season like sitting in an airport after a long flight.
You’re in between destinations.
You’re not who you were when you boarded.
You’re tired. You’re carrying a lot. And the gate for what’s next hasn’t been announced yet.

But it will.

In the meantime, your only job is to breathe.
To stretch.
To hydrate.
To honor the journey, even in the quiet layover.

You’ve let go.
And that was brave.
Now, your work is to stay open—not rush ahead.

The next chapter is already finding its way to you.

With gentleness,
Christine
Founder, The Midlife Surprise Society