When life falls apart, one of the first questions we whisper to ourselves is: Why?

Why did this happen? Why me? Why now?
And often, no tidy answer appears.

Loss has a way of leaving us with blank pages where we expected a clear storyline. A marriage ends, a loved one is gone, a career shifts, or the future we pictured vanishes—and suddenly we’re left holding pieces of a story that no longer make sense.

Here’s where storytelling becomes more than words on a page: it becomes a tool for survival, and eventually, a path to meaning.

Stories Help Us Organize the Chaos

Our brains are wired for story. When something shatters our lives, storytelling gives us a framework to hold the chaos. It’s not about making the loss “okay”—it’s about giving shape to the unthinkable so we can begin to walk through it.

Even saying out loud, “This is the season I never expected, but I’m still here” is a way of reclaiming ground.

Stories Help Us See Patterns

When we tell our stories—on paper, to a trusted friend, or within a supportive community—we start to notice threads we didn’t see before. Strength we didn’t know we had. Love that still surrounds us. Lessons that soften even the hardest days.

Meaning doesn’t erase pain, but it does remind us that pain isn’t the only thing left.

Stories Help Us Move Forward

At some point, we face a choice: will this loss become the end of our story, or a turning point?
That doesn’t mean “finding silver linings” or rushing to gratitude. It means gently asking: How will I carry this with me in a way that allows me to keep living?

Storytelling lets us honor what’s been lost without letting it define everything ahead.

Try This Today

Set a timer for 10 minutes. Write the story of your loss as if you’re telling it to someone who has never met you before. Then, read it back and circle one sentence or phrase that holds meaning for you. That small thread may be the beginning of a new way to carry your story.

✨ Want to go deeper?
In Pathfinder and the Inner Circle memberships this month I’m teaching a masterclass called You Are the Storyteller Now: The Power of Narrative in Healing. We’ll explore how to use storytelling to make meaning from even the hardest chapters of life.

Alongside the class, I’m guiding a 30-Day Challenge with daily reflections and journaling prompts to help you practice rewriting, reframing, reclaiming, and living into a new story.

If you’re not ready for membership but long for a place to feel understood, the Midlife Surprise Society is our free community where you can begin connecting with women who “get it.”